June 2012
6 posts
1 tag
LORE
Bubastis Slaughtermouth grimaced as the fair Eustachia sobbed in terror into his sturdy iron cuirass. Dust fell from the rafters of the ancient tavern as the swarm of squirrelcrabs picked at the adobe mudbrick walls. Bubastis had shoved several large oaken tables up against the tavern’s doors and windows, but it was only a matter of time before the vermin gnawed and burrowed their way in.
...
1 tag
The Dad Zone
Father’s day is tomorrow, and for most of my life, it’s been kind of a rough time in terms of Hallmark holidays.
My mom raised me, and my dad had always been out of the picture. Like, completely. We never had any kind of interaction. No phone calls, no weekend trips. I didn’t actually know his name until I was a teenager, simply because it wasn’t a thing I felt like...
Firemen
Firefighters are great because they’re just like, a bunch of dudes who live in a special clubhouse, and when something catches on fire, they get all excited and put on funny outfits and slide down a pole and get in a big red car with lights and noisemakers on it. “WHOA WHOA WHOA LOOK AT US WE HATE FIRES WHOA WHOA WHOA” and then they go and shoot water at the fire until it’s...
LORE
With his trademark avian swiftness, Huxtable Barnclaw ascended the spiral staircase to the Bonelord’s Budoir. At the top of the stairs, the owl druid was greeted by a large metal door completely covered in living eyeballs.
“OPEN!” shrieked Huxtable. The door blinked.
From a small pouch on his waistcoat, the owl druid produced a small golden object. At one end was a tiny jeweled...
