[The following is transcribed from a journey entry I wrote in 5th grade.]

1/24/97

“Today Chris is coming over and on the 19th I got a pet rat - her name is Sniffles. She is very cute. At Chris’s house I played a computer game called Duke Nukem 3D. It is based on a really crappy game called just Duke Nukem. I that [sic] Duke had red skin, in this he goes around with all sorts of guns + blasts alien scum to a small pile of guts on the ground. It is a really cool game and he swears in it alot too… I going to write a letter to the makers about a sequel and what I thought about their game.”

Snortin’ candy circa 2002.

What the fuck do fish have to do with anything else on this popup.

"The black Lava rocks on the beach are frequented by large, disgusting clumsy Lizards. They are as black as the porous rocks over which they crawl & seek their prey from the Sea. I call them ‘imps of darkness’. They assuredly well become the land they inhabit."

Charles Darwin, who apparently hates Marine Iguanas.

Max Scoville’s Fantasy Beach GDC 2012 post-mortem

This last week has been crazy, as weeks frequently are when things happen during them. The annual Game Developers Conference was held in San Francisco, and being a guy who is in videos about video games, I attended it. This meant a lot of running around while wearing a lanyard, a lot of on-camera stuff, getting less sleep than I’m used to, and of course, seeing people.

Can I just state publicly, right now, for real, on the record, how much I absolutely adore this industry? I know it’s super corny, but I just want to gush about it for a little bit. Also, I realize this could totally be read in a smug, insincere keynote-speakerish tone, and that’s not my intention at all. I’m sitting on my couch in my underpants smiling like an idiot.

Last year’s GDC was my first big video game event. I think maybe two people recognized me, and I had no idea who anyone else was. I met a handful of Destructoid editors and various other out-of-towners whom I’d never actually seen in person, just cyberbullied/cybered with over various social networks, which was cool, but I was totally the new kid then. This year, it felt like a big ol’ family reunion.

The thing I love about the video game industry is that it’s really fun. Like, video games are a fun thing. Sometimes they suck, and anything that is “work” can get frustrating after a while. I realize that I have a stupidly fun job, and some people in the industry might hate their jobs, but I think we can all agree that video games, to dumb it down, are an enjoyable thing that people enjoy. In addition to being a fun thing, they’re also a super high tech thing and a super creative thing. This is an industry full of inventors, artists, and brainiacs who are all working towards the common goal of making things that are fun.

On my end of things, there’s some friendly rivalry between gaming sites. It’s always fun to talk shit on competing gaming news outlets, but in reality, they’re all pretty cool guys. Greg Miller hosts a rival (humor me) video show for IGN, and he came up and kissed me on the cheek like a dirty Frenchman the other night. He is my competition, but I really don’t care, because he’s my friend. It’s the same way with the Machinima guys, except without the kissing because Adam’s beard is so scratchy. 

There are some egos, and there’s some bullshit, but in my experience, game industry folks are pretty awesome to be around. It’s not every industry in which you get invited to the competing company’s company party. 

Meeting developers is pretty great because they make video games. If you handed me a computer and said “make a video game” I wouldn’t know where to start, and these are people who do that for a living. My esteemed colleague Anthony Carboni put it best: “You put math into a computer and cowboys come out.”

The sound design guys from Volition flagged me down in a hotel lobby and got all excited to meet me, and thanked me for hyping up Saints Row The Third. I got all flustered and said something like “No no no! This is backwards! You guys made a game where I got to dress up like a slutty panda and beat policemen to death with a giant dildo! Thank YOU for making an amazing thing.”

It’s entirely possible that I’m completely naive and oblivious, and everyone hates me, but that’s okay. Everybody’s been pretty nice so far.  

Being on the internet all the time, it’s really easy to succumb to all the contrarianism that seems to be a thing these days. I see it a lot in YouTube comments. People don’t like something, and they obsess over it. That’s so dumb, why would you spend your energy disliking something instead of paying attention to something enjoyable?

Anyway, GDC was like the opposite of YouTube comments for me. I got to see a whole lot of people who are also excited and passionate about video games, and most of us are lucky enough to do stuff involving games for a living. We’re a whole lot of happy, happy nerds. Looking at the world from behind a keyboard is the quickest way to forget that it’s full of human beings. We might argue about journalistic integrity or we might give Gears Of War 3 an 8 out of 10, but at the end of the day, I think we’re all pretty happy doing what we do.

Video game people, you’re all wonderful and I love you. I’ll see you at PAX East.

internalprimatesforever asked: max scoville is a pretty cool guy. He fights horse boots and doesn't afraid of anything.

That’s not a question dongbag.

Weeaboo fratboy weaselferret.

I made some Pokémon wallpapers for my Playstation Vita. Nothing about any of this makes any sense.